Or maybe that you will read today.
Okay, probably somewhere in between.
I'd like you to meet my new healthcare team:
I can tell you with the utmost conviction that YOU are now your sole, core healthcare record keeper. Let's repeat that for emphasis: YOU MUST KEEP TRACK OF EVERYTHING RELATED TO YOUR HEALTHCARE. Get a nice, blank book and start writing down EVERYTHING. The dates, locations, who ordered it and the results. Xrays, blood tests, mammograms, colonoscopies - the whole 9 yards. Even though my physician has to write a referral for every miniscule THING, none of this comes back to them in the form of information or results. I spent a lot of time sitting in my elegant paper gown waiting for the PA to go find out the results of a colonoscopy I had in December and a hip x-ray I had 3 weeks ago. All done by physicians in the system I was referred to, all in the same hospital system, but never mind that. Nadda. Next she had to pop out to see what the latest guidelines were for pap smears - apparently it's every 3 years now, so I didn't need to shave my legs. Crap.
My understanding of having a "primary care physician" was that there was someone out there who keeps track of all this stuff. Apparently not. Bonus - it's getting worse. I wish I had known this even five years ago - I've had a slew of medical problems (mostly spinal - with specialists) and no one knows from nuthin'. It is appalling. It is infuriating. Mostly it is scary, because as I get older it's only going to get worse, right? I'm not going to wake up someday and find my degenerative discs have miraculously healed and everything is hunky dory - yay!
I'll probably keep a digital spreadsheet of all this information, but a blank book won't crash or get a virus. (Ironic.) I'm fully prepared to load a flash drive and take it with me to the doctor so the most accurate records are at my fingertips. I'm also going to CHARGE THEM FOR THE INFORMATION because why the hell not - they would charge me for a copy of my records, right?
I left with lab slips for more blood work and a referral for a mammogram. I hate getting my mam's 'grammed. I'm debating on even doing it because the results won't get back to them and they'll never know, right? I've got an attitude about those damn 'gramms - every time I have had a blip they refer me on to get an ultrasound. Here is an idea - screw mammograms and just have ultrasounds. They are painless, faster and easier. (That is why there are no scrotum-grams, just sayin'. Men would never put up with getting their dainties smashed up between two plexiglass plates, so why do we?) PS - Spare me the mammogram lecture, I'm an ovarian cancer survivor, I know the drill.
I'm good and angry. I've got to look at changing primary care physicians, but I don't know if I can find one that can (or will) do the job I expect them to do. I don't know if any of them do it anymore. I have a feeling it's on us to keep the record. I'm going to need a boatload of Big Chief Tablets to keep track of all this information, John-boy.
