We Have A Winner!

I did not think it possible, but we have a new winner in the CELL PHONE JACKASS competition.  The former title  (held by a woman who, while sitting in the stall next to me in a public bathroom,  was conducting business while taking care of her, um, business) had held the crown for about 2 years.

No longer the Queen of Cell Phone Jackasses, there is now a KING.  While standing in the teller line of  a very busy bank yesterday,  the new  KOCPJ came in, and with his phone on speakerphone (at a deafening volume) proceeded to make out a lengthy deposit slip while a woman's voice rambled on (without drawing breath) about the  (expletive) man who has (expletive) her over for years and who deserves (expletive) and  needed to be (expletive).  The boy-man who had the phone resting on the counter picked it up and laughingly said, "Hey, I'm in the bank and I gottcha on speakerphone!" and continued to laugh hilariously.  The reaction of the woman (still on speakerphone) was, "What?  You (expletive)!  I could (expletive) kill you! You dumb (expletive.)"  The man continued the conversation (still on speakerphone) while making his deposit.  The tellers were wide-eyed and speechless.

I went back to work berating myself for not having the spine to stand up to him and say "take it outside, you moron."  Probably a good thing I did not as he was a bit of a psycho to begin with, as are most of the CPJ I have met up with. But hey, thanks for sharing, fella.   Just promise me you won't reproduce.