Bring out Your Dead!

I'm not dead yet.
(Love me some Monty Python).

So....it's been a while.  That is what happens when you are working multiple jobs, finishing multiple gift quilts that can't be posted until they have  been delivered, and oh - I don't know - LIVING IN A HELLISH SNOW VORTEX.  Officially we had 108" of snow, 103" arriving after January 5, 2015, but that's Boston's total and as we are just north on Cape Ann, we picked up substantial more ocean effect snow on top of that.

This is my 6'4" husband knocking down the treacherous lip of  snow hanging off the garage.  This was our only access out of our house for over a month and a half, and we had to fight to keep it open.  One day we went downstairs to leave and found so much snow had drifted on to the storm door that we had to take the glass panel out (from the inside) so we could push enough snow away in order to get the door open. This was not as lighthearted and whimsical as it sounds, nosirreee. The good news is we've been able to use our front door (just like normals) for about a week and a half. It still feels brand new and sparkly and wonderful. The bad news is the winter kill and melting snow has revealed all kinds of awful stuff. Lots of work ahead.

So what did I get accomplished?  Finished an epic battle with a Christmas "woobie" quilt for my friend John. John LOVES Charlie Brown Christmas and requested his own quilt for seasonal decorating and snuggling.  It's a hard thing to make a quilt for.... let's just say a guy with multiple cars and a lot of Rolex, etc. around his oceanfront home. It took ages, I made it all up myself, and I'll never do it again.

Some of these are "work in progress" pictures but the overall effect is there. I didn't get good pictures taken because I finished it JUST before Christmas and didn't have time. I'll do so next year, just to get the proof of it in my files. BTW - the blue lights around the border represent the blue lights he does on his house every Christmas. It's another good story that goes back about 27 years, I'll write about it sometime.

This is a shirtings quilt top I did for our friends, Matt and John. Matt brought over 2 huge bags of their 'old' shirts and asked me to start a quilt for them. (Note to self - never again agree to make a quilt for an engineer.) It took longer to cut up the shirts and iron out flat pieces to cut than it did to sew it all back together. It took me almost as long to sell him on the idea of sashing it with the light gray instead of harsh white. (They have 2 huge dogs....).  John didn't know about this until he opened it on Christmas, and I think there was some unrest about "I thought we had those in the attic for storage, I needed one of them....".  Glad I wasn't there for that. When I saw John next, he gave me one of his wonderful, rib-crushing hugs and thanked me. That's a happy ending. It will be king sized when finished, but who knows when that will happen.

ME. MOI.  After 150 years of making quilts for other people, I took time out to make one for ME. I'm sharing it with my husband because he sleeps with me, but it is MINE. It was made from 100% stash - front and back - and boy did it knock down the piles. I'm not racing to buy new fabric because I'd need to make another 3 or 4 of these this size to be able to rationalize that.  I love it. There are fabrics in there from my mom and one of my sisters' stashes. There are fabrics from other quilts I've made.  It is warm and wrinkly and it makes me very happy.  It is also HUGE.  I sleep on my side and (TMI WARNING) I don't like it when the quilt doesn't cover my extremities. This one does. 

That's enough for now. I survived QuiltCon in Austin, Texas and had a ball working a booth for Why Quilts Matter - History, Art and Politics. I wasn't able to stock up on Aurifil thread the way I had hoped - they had a company booth but they weren't vending. I did get a good color chart and they sent me to a couple of booths that had limited colors, so I did manage to get my hands on some thread and their new (to me) floss. I've burned through enough thread in the last 7 months to realize I need to get the BIG CONES of some of the neutrals I use so much of - it's worth the investment. Besides, I'm not buying fabric, right? Okay, so I did buy ONE piece of fabric, an incredibly beautiful wax print from Ananse Village,  but that is for a jacket and not a quilt so it doesn't count against the stash. (You can reach me at 1-800-RATIONALIZE)

I must stop NOW. I have 3 quilts in the on-deck circle, two are pieced and ready to quilt. One is a wedding quilt due this fall and....not started. But I have the fabric in my stash, so there's that. That counts as "started," right?

Multi-Tasking, Thanks for Asking

This is not a pattern. These are shapes.

I am all over the place.  Depending on the outside temperature I find that during the shoulder season I need something to work on in different rooms of the house.  On cool days the upstairs sewing room is best. I'm cutting in to an old, hurt quilt and making a teddy bear.  I had to find a new pattern because while I saved the directions and the pattern envelope from my old (and I do mean old) pattern, the pattern itself went missing. I love a crisp, new pattern. I cut it apart with pinking shears, too dull to use on fabric but perfect for that light tissue that real patterns are printed on.Then I indulged in the ritual 'ironing of the pattern' where you lightly press the fold and crease marks out so when you place it on the fabric it lies perfectly flat. I started sewing the pattern pieces together without consulting the directions. I was using a REAL pattern, and the markings and information on the pattern pieces made that possible.

THIS IS A PATTERN

 Well that, and because I learned how to sew from using real patterns back in the day when Home Ec was mandatory for 7th grade girls.  I still think it should be mandatory - for boys and girls.  Why not learn to sew? Cook a meal? Banking, growing plants, living with a budget. Do a load of laundry without ruining the works. How to paint a wall. How to wield a cutting brush. Life skills, baby, I'm talking about basic. life. skills. Back to the bear -  I started watching an old movie on the VHS in my sewing room (man, I am a dinosaur) and clipped and darted and notched my way thought more than half of the bear before I called it quits for the night. (Okay there is a DVD player in there too, just sayin'.) I love old movies. I love REAL patterns. They are a marvel of engineering. How else would you get such elegant curves and shapes and forms?

NOT BLUE

If it's too hot for the sewing room I work on the main floor in the family room, paper piecing. I'm working on making a new purse and I loved my Japanese big bag so much I'm doing a smaller version, but NOT IN BLUE, MOM (if you're reading this in heaven and you probably are because I hear you yell at me every time I sew over pins.) I went WAY out of my color comfort zone and am doing this in shades of purple, mainly because it's already in my stash and I'm not getting any younger. I am photographing the hexie layout on my ironing board so I can work from the picture when I go downstairs to sew it together. (Easy to consult the iPad and double check the layout.) I'm also using straw needles and YLI silk thread to join them - double thread, because it's a purse. Even with interfacing and future layers, I want it sturdy. I must say, silk thread is the most unbelievably EASY thing to sew with, once you face the fact that properly knotting it is never going to happen. Even a quilters knot slid down the length of it tends to just melt apart. Oh silk, you are so...silky. It's very therapeutic to hand sew in the evening, I find I sleep better when I'm thus tranquilized.  As long as I manage to leave my iPad alone and not read email, Twitter and other assorted addictions (okay ANGRY BIRDS) I have a productive evening with beautiful results.

Sewing used to be my reward.  I work multiple jobs and it involves a LOT of juggling. I say "used to be a reward" because I've realized lately that it is something I MUST do. I'm happier, more aware of color and texture in my personal and professional lives (I work with art groups) and it opens up my head.  When I was commuting to Lowell every day I used to sing in the car.  I'm sure people wondered what the hell I was singing that took so much air and effort (usually something from Handel's Messiah or another choral work...) but it had the same effect. While it did cut down my road rage, I will confess to changing the words to an expletive when someone cut me off or changed lanes in front of me too abruptly.  It also made me laugh hysterically - you need to sing "motherf)($&#(er" in full soprano head voice to get the full effect.  Regardless of the word usage, when you get it really going and flowing it spirals up and creates a kind of harmonic buzz in your head. You get a little bit....high. At least I do. Music and art are the gifts that let us glimpse at the Paradise Lost - the world we were supposed to be living in, and not the one mankind has created.

I love autumn, it's my favorite season. It's good for inner reflection, taking inventory of life and time left. Hand sewing provides the opportunity to think back, remember, and relive wonderful memories. I am more awake - is that possible? I'm conscious of counting my days, wanting them to be full and filled with the glories of creation, the people I love and excellent football. Not every day will be so burnished and successful, but I'm working on it with the hope that it helps me through the days that are.......well, not so much.

What was any art but a mold in which to imprison for a moment the shining elusive element which is life itself - life hurrying past us and running away, too strong to stop, too sweet to lose.

Willa Cather

Caps for Sale

Remember that book from childhood?  Caps for Sale was one of my favorites - along with What Shall I Put in the Hole That I Dig? As I got older I would read it to younger siblings (and anyone else within earshot) with much more ribald interpretation. I still giggle when I remember some of the things we put in that hole to see if it would grow a ------ tree!

In an attempt to generate some income I decided to make up some hats and put them in our shop.  Nothing fancy, just the kind of thing to break up the hot sun but not the bank.  I had a lot of batiks in my stash left over from a big quilt project so it was nice to use up odds and ends. The ones for the babies were a LOT of work and while I'll never recoup my investment of time, it does pay for the fabric and helps me downsize my stash. It also gives me something productive to sew and that, more than anything else, seems to soothe my ever present anxieties.   It comes with the added bonus of listening to books on tape while I work. I check out digital books from my local library so there is no end of things to explore. Right now I'm listening to The Last Lion: Winston Spencer Churchill, Volume 3: Defender of the Realm, 1940‑1965.       

 I'm not a WWII aficionado but I'm fascinated with Churchill and completely in love with well written prose. No one writes like the English. I've been on a Jane Austen tear for about 3 weeks and find myself using expressions like, "My dear you must prepare yourself" when I tell my husband I have cleaned out the refrigerator and saved us all from death by salmonella and/or rotted food.

Sewing also helps me feel productive when when "PPP Down" is the only thing that  registers on my computer screen when I'm trying to find out why I'm off line ....AGAIN.  I have learned to reboot modems, re-initialize, delete setups and re-do them, and taken a ton of screenshots with dates to prove it all. I've learned you can't shame Verizon in to useful customer service or get an acknowledgement that it is THEIR problem. They are happy to have me pay for a repairman come out to my house to check their line. Inside the house - it's my problem and I'll pay for that. Outside? That's on you, Verizon.  My husband has an aversion to AT&T (his people invented the vendetta, you know) but I'm ready to pull the plug.  I'll just say, "In vain have I struggled. It will not do. You must allow me to tell you how much I abhor Verizon. My good opinion, once lost, is lost forever."  Frankly, I'd like to put Verizon in that "hole that I dig" and see if it grows a )#&*)@(*#&$  tree. Meanwhile, I plod along and take files on a flash drive to computers at work, or work on my iPad on a friend's wifi. (Comcast, in case you were wondering.) I'm just thankful my Bernina doesn't need an internet connection to work, but if it did I know Bernina would have some rockin' customer service!

Bag O' Brains

I admit to nerding out over strange things, mostly fonts and high resolution image files, but with the advent of the USB flash drive came my most unusual digital obsession.  Like anything else it started with one, then a pair, and after 3 (as you all know) you are a collector. I find it a remarkably good way to backup files (it helps me justify acquiring more) and it really makes so many things portable.  Right now I'm working on sorting Excel databases for the upcoming election and having it on a portable drive  makes working on it at odd moments so much easier. I never have to say, "Oh hell, it's on the store computer" or vice versa with the iMac at home.  (Before you ask, I already have a DropBox. It's not the same thing.)

So when did I turn the corner and realize I had a whole honking bunch of these things?  Shortly after the umpteenth time of rooting about in my purse to fish out the right one, I determined it would be a good idea to have them all in ONE place. These little zip bags are easy to make so I whipped one right up. It wasn't until I started loading it with all my drives and dongles that it kind of hit me I might have a problem.   For almost 10 minutes I  was convinced of it, but then it passed.  I have three part-time jobs (not including the store) and organization is a must. I worry less now about losing information or computer failure or being hit by a bus - all my replacement needs is the correct USB drive for that job/subject.

I have gotten past the point of swooning at the sight of USB sushi, USB Angry Birds or USB any other bizarre types, but if the price is right and the capacity is impressive I have been known to bite.  After all, how could you resist this?

Historic Paper Piecing - Design Wall Monday

I've got a pretty broad range of fabrics in my stash and what I make reflects that spectrum.  I have an equal opportunity (and era) stash.  However, I do love hand sewing and since I love paper piecing hexagons I thought I'd give it a whirl with some different shapes and historic fabrics.

Oy vey.

I wasn't prepared for all those ANGLES.  I can stitch hexagons in my sleep but the octagons and coffins (my word) were a new ball game. To make matters worse, I PAID FOR THE SCRAPS so I couldn't ditch the project.  No, I am not insane - they are the gleanings from late 1800's - early 1900's quilts that have been rescued and conserved by loving professionals. In some cases, entire portions of the quilt had to be removed and the surrounding fabric was lovingly harvested and sold for around $8 a bag.  To a good home, you might say.

I bought a bag of the scraps just to touch them, to study up close and personal how those fabrics were made, the stunning colors and intricate designs.  They just breathed life.  I didn't know what I would do with them until I hit on the idea of paper piecing a little something to go on my end table. (Okay, probably under glass, I spill a lot of coffee.) I felt compelled to gently hand wash them, let them air dry and used the survivors in this bit of piecing. I like the idea of giving those very old fabrics a very new life.  The gold connecting squares and the border fabric are not old, just reproduction fabrics in the same color family.  Even though from now on I will probably stick to hexagons, I really like this little bit of a thing and can't wait to see it finished.

I Think I'm Turning Japanese

I really think so.

(Okay, it's an old song by the group The Vapors, but for me it's for realsies.)

I've had a love affair with all things Japanese since I visited there back in 2004. We were there because Joe had been made president of the local Rotary chapter that year and one of his "duties" was to attend the world conference. Duty? Hell yeah! The club picked up his tab so our only expense (besides meals and incidentals) was my plane ticket and a big boost to our hotel allowance. (I've got a "good hotel" thing and I'm willing to pay for it, dammit.)

The trip was epic - Rotary gave all attendees a beautiful tote bag filled with rail passes, bus passes and all kinds of maps and information.  We traveled all over by ourselves, got lost a few times, ate all kinds of food we had NO idea about but loved every bite.  The temples in Nara were breathtaking.  Our suitcases came back jammed with elegant, diminutive Japanese sake flasks, kitchen utensils, and FABRIC.

I've hoarded the fabric, doling it out in bits and pieces for worthy things. I added to the stash when I worked at The New England Quilt Museum. I was fortunate enough to enjoy an employee discount on the uber-gorgeous Japanese taupes and imports - resistance was futile. My Japanese stash occupies its own very select storage box.

[caption id="attachment_2816" align="alignright" width="300"] Oh SNAP-in pocket with dragonfly snap closure & an exterior pocket[/caption]

Just after Christmas I started looking at my very tired purse and decided it was TIME to bust out some really good fabric and treat myself for a change.  Since reading bag patterns is my kryptonite I decided to just take what I know and sew. It hasn't been pretty.  I've added at least 3 new variations on old swear phrases to my vocabulary. I'm not finished yet but I kind of like where it is going, even though the finished height was supposed to be the width and the finished width...well, you get it.  I started paper piecing the hexagons just after Christmas - I love hand sewing and I love how Japanese fabrics go together.  I'm working on making

[caption id="attachment_2799" align="alignright" width="300"] Bag interior with oh SNAPS![/caption]

different snap-in attachments that can vary  with # of pockets and depth. Sometimes I like to tote my iPad places and it will fit very comfortably in the finished purse.  I still need to finish a few things, cover a thin slice of foam core with fabric so it has a nice, flat bottom, and make the straps.  I'm enjoying this enormously, even thought it has meant a lot of re-doing and re-engineering things as I go along.  Why not?  There is no deadline and it's just for me.  For ME.

PS - Happy New Year - I can't believe it's been so long! I noticed that the powers-that-be are sticking ads on my blog posts. GAAUGH.  I am not responsible for their appearance or their content. Turn your nose up disdainfully at them.

PPSS - I feel like a drug dealer but....want to (beautifully) burn a few hours of your life? Love trees? Love all things Japanese?  Click here.  You're welcome.

Multi-Tasking Sewing Notions

About three years ago I was at a quilt show in New Hampshire when I found this "new" kind of seam ripper.

The woman at the booth demonstrated how it worked and I thought it was pretty clever.  As I am chronically incapable of passing up a cool sewing thingie, I handed over about $5 (I think) and snapped it up.

Fast forward to yesterday when I was in one of those beauty supply shops looking for some super-serious ginormo hair clips.  (My plan to grow out my hair has had a head-on collision with summer heat.  If I don't get it off my neck I'm going to shave my head.).  I was debating the purchase of a good pair of scissors (see paragraph above) when I saw these:



You guessed it.  Exactly the same thing.  This 3-pack was about the same as I paid for one of them in New Hampshire.  Who knew?  Now you ALL do.

PS - So these are facial razors?  I have no idea how this kind of thing would be used, am I missing something here? Come to think of it, 98%  of the stuff in those beauty supply stores looks like they require entirely too much work, effort and maintenance. However, when they can be pressed in to service as a quilting notion......

Rebooting My Life

Okay, I'm still messing around with the look of my blog. This indicates...well, you already know.

My life is rebooting.  I didn't push the button or anything, it's just rebooting. Mega heavy conference with my orthopedic/pain doc yesterday (AKA Dr. NomNom because he is HOT!) has left me with a fist full of new prescriptions and the realization that I am not ever going to be as carefree-mobile as I was ever again.  The surgical options were rejected by both of us, him because they are rarely successful and me because I'm DONE with surgery.  (If they gave out frequent surgery miles  I'd be traveling non-stop.)  It's simply degenerative.  There are no do-overs or rewinds or magic cures. Phrases like "managing the pain" and "experimenting with different drugs" are written - with ink - in my file.

So where do I go from here?  What do I do? I need a job.  I can't commute very far, it's physically impossible and consequently rules out a shot at the better paying and more interesting jobs.  I know what I want to do.  I want to do what I've wanted to do all my life. I want to sew. I want to make quilts. I want to make quilts, totes, bags, my funky necklaces (like these), custom quilts for babies, weddings, anniversaries, birthdays.  I want a room in my house where I can walk in every day and be happy that I am there and do what I love.  I have the room. I have the equipment. I have a good stash.  That part is done. I have my husband's shop to sell in, as well as being ready (and able) to set up and market an on-line shop. I even have all the wholesale paperwork and permits because we have them through Joe's store.

I have no idea how to do the rest.

Venture capital would be necessary - the bills still need to be paid while all of this is being sorted out.  I can't see mailing Verizon a nice wall hanging and saying, "Here, this is for July, August and September, I'm trying to get my business up and running, m'kay?"  Frankly no bank around here is going to invest in a home business making "those blanket things" as the Illuminati tend to call quilts.

I'm not getting any younger. In fact, in about 3 weeks I'll be getting another year older. If not now, when do I do this?  I've had it in the back of my mind for ages and ages.  I always thought, "Someday I'll be able to do what I really love."  I have fewer days in front of me than I do behind me. This is probably my last chance to do this. I'm terrified. I'm not sure how to make this happen but I want to close my eyes and jump. No regrets.  I never want to look back at this time and think, "I should have done it then."

So what do I do?  How do I make this happen?   Anyone?  Esty and Twitter peeps who have done this - how did you get started?

Getting "IT"

It's never a good sign when I'm playing around with the look of my blog. It is an indicator of  one of two things: brain freeze ( I got nuthin')  or time-out (when I'm stressed, heat stressed, anxiety stressed, etc. and anything I put on the internet would be of the shock and awe variety, and not the "good" shock and awe, either. ) So there you go.  I'm playing with the look of my blog.  (Okay, I'm in time-out.)

In the meantime I have an amazing labor of love to occupy my hands.  A very good friend has one of the wall hangings made by my mother. We used to sell them in our store here in Gloucester and then mail a check back to her where she would cash it in and buy more quilting fabric.  (Mom kicked ass that way.)     Linn  has had this beauty hanging in her home for many years and recently asked me to take it home and give it a wash - she was nervous about doing it herself.  Okey dokey.  Washed. Line dried in the approaching scorching heat.  When I took it down I noticed that the sleeve on the back of the hanging had some places where the threads had just let go.  Age happens.  I found a spool of black thread and a sharp needle and I'm redoing the entire sleeve.  It is a miracle that I'm able to do it without clutching it to my chest, crying, and refusing to let it go.  (Eleven years later I think I'm finally making progress with my  grief.)  I'm actually enjoying the process, loving the chance to work on something my mom made, and grateful for the fact that Linn GETS IT.

There are not a lot of people out there who "get it" when it comes to quilts or, for that matter, anything hand crafted.  Paintings in galleries are found "worthy" but quilts, knit socks, hats or scarves are just KRAFTY with a K and not "worthy" of being looked at as serious creative expressions that require time and talent.  It has been an uphill battle for years.  To show my serious intent I was going to start a quilt guild here in Gloucester and call it "Quilt Bitches" and we'd all get Harley-Davidson tattoos (but the motorcycle would have a quilted seat.)  Cool, right? 'Cept I'd never get a tattoo.

A quilter's quest for street cred is apparently a life-long venture.  This is made more difficult by The Learning Channel's newest program, Craft Wars, hosted by..... TORI SPELLING.  Seriously, TLC?  I personally believe the only time she's had a hot glue gun in her hand was when she was replacing some hair extensions that had fallen out. A Twitter peep of mine remarked that  while she did watch the debut show,  she found "Tori's  clown-like makeup distracting."  TLC needs to learn (oohh, how ironic...) that credibility is an important part of attracting an intelligent and respectful audience who - when given intelligent content from creditable sources - have a way of going out and spending money with the show's sponsors to recreate those ideas in their own home.  It's a concept.

Time to get back to sewing the sleeve on this wall hanging.  Linn was skittish about  washing it herself because she wanted to make sure it was done carefully and properly because she loves this thing as much as I do.  She respects the time, effort, labor and creativity that went in to producing it. She gets it.

Why Quilts Matter DVD Give-Away

 

EDIT:  Carla Langendoen of Cora Quilts was the DVD winner. Hope to see you blog your thoughts about the series, Cora!

 

When working at the New England Quilt Museum I was fortunate enough to get a peek at a DVD called Why Quilts Matter: History, Art and Politics from Shelly Zegart and the Kentucky Quilt Project, Inc.  I loved it.  I talked to the TV while I watched it. I wrote a blog entry about it and was later asked to write a guest blog for their website.  Before any of that happened I purchased two copies of the DVD so I could own one and donate the other to my local library. I feel that strongly about it, and  continue to encourage others to do the same. (BTW, there is no monetary compensation involved here)

A few weeks ago I was contacted by the Why Quilts Matter people (who are kickass fun, BTW) and asked to view one section of the documentary and write some study-group type questions for a new Continuing the Conversation guide to the series. I was delighted to do so, and was sent a copy of the DVD as a "thank you" gift.  Since I already have a copy I decided to give away the gift copy.  I really don't like the whole blog "give-away" thing, mostly because I never win and  really think some of you guys are all up in your head when you require people to jump through hoops and do 94 things in order to qualify.  There, I said it.  THIS will be a very simple, straightforward give-away.

To enter:   Send me a fat quarter of Liberty of London fabric.

HAH! See what I did there?  Okay, seriously, go check out their website - you are on your honor. Then, leave a comment with your fantasy quilting or sewing notion.  For example: my fantasy sewing notion is a bobbin that works with a spool of thread. You throw a spool on top of the machine, snap a spool in the bobbin case and you sew like a maniac for days - no stopping to reload the )(#&*()@#&$ bobbin.  What is your fantasy notion? Maybe some genius out there will create it and we'll all be happy.

In about a week I'll holler downstairs (to my husband), "Pick a number between 1 and ----" and that will be the winner. (I'll have to do it a couple of times because he is deaf as a haddock and I have to repeat everything about three times.) Sigh.

Okay, let's have it - what are your brilliant ideas?  PS - the DVD is great for individuals or guilds or groups - lots of topics and good information. (But you knew that from going to their website, right?)

Using the "Good" Scissors

My mother had a nice pair of Gingher scissors that were to be used ONLY on fabric.  She did a lot of garment construction - clothes for her kids -  but later she became a quilter.  As children we were roundly and soundly clobbered if we took the "good" scissors and used them to cut up paper or magazines or newspapers.

Fast forward to about six months ago when I saw a much smaller pair of Ginghers that called my name. I could not resist the siren song of having a really, really good pair of scissors so I took the plunge.  They came in a lovely little box which I kept open on my cutting table so I could admire them then and relish the pride of ownership.  It was enough for me to just have them. I was content to keep them,  save them for something "good."

Fast forward again to about two weeks ago when I crashed and burned on a baby quilt for my niece. I've been doing this long enough to know that when things go south you need to just. walk. away. and come back later when the fog clears.  I decided to take a bag of leftover quilt scraps and try my hand a paper piecing hexagons. (Note:  do not start paper piecing hexagons - EXTREMELY addictive.)  I went to grab a scissors to trim up the hexies when, for some unexplainable reason, I busted out the Ginghers.

You know where this is going.  I could not believe the difference.  Like a hot knife through cold butter, this thing sliced and clipped like a laser.  I was  thrilled with the results, the ease of cutting, the razor crisp edges. Like dawn breaking over Marblehead (local joke) I realized it was STEWPID to keep things "for good."  What if I get hit buy a bus tomorrow?  What was I waiting for?  WHY DO WOMEN DO THIS?  Because honestly I know I am not the only one. Every woman on the planet has something put away "for good" and most of those things will never see use or the light of day. Why do we do this?  So we have something to look forward to?  Is the "looking forward to" part better than the actual joy of using it or wearing it or whatever the hell it is we're trying to capture?  I don't know, but I don't think so. I'm not getting any younger and I'm tired of waiting.  Not only am I going to use these Ginghers, but I'm gonna bust out some cash and pick up one of the new Gingher Seam Rippers.  You heard me. Retractable blade, beeuches.  Who says quilters are old ladies with afghans in their laps?  I'm armed and dangerous.  I run with scissors. ( Really, really GOOD ones. )

1-800-RATIONALIZE

With the multi-whammy of additional, unexpected income taxes due, an expensive major appliance "shitting the bed" (Joe's favorite saying and I've just picked it up because....it's so.... accurate), finding out the source of my knee problems is a torn meniscus and the upcoming one year anniversary of the loss of my Dad all rolling up on me.........well, I kind of had a meltdown. "Kind of" in the sense that I didn't actually throw anything (hey, I've grown. Besides, I don't wear high heels anymore and I'm out of spackle) but everything else cut loose in a peri-menopausal-chronic-pain-grieving-hormonal rage of tears, angst and depression.  My dark Irish side can throw down with the best of 'em.

So what to do?  I needed to drive.  Serious "get out of Dodge" driving. That isn't possible here because it's too congested and populated. No wide open spaces and long reaches of road and open sky.  This therapy always worked for me when I lived in Nebraska but in Massachusetts - well, it's not happening.  I still wanted to make a road trip and maybe do a little retail therapy ( a logical response to a cash-strapped crisis, right?) and pick up some Kaffe Fassett fabric I've been coveting for, oh, years.  Seriously coveting.

[caption id="attachment_2521" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="I did not buy ALL of these....just some...."][/caption]

Normally I would call my sister Pat before embarkation. Pat is the queen of rationalization.  You can call her and ask her about anything  and she will give you really good reasons to 1) do it or 2) buy it.  What I came up with would pale in comparison but I think it was pretty respectable in a dark, depressive kind of way.

Mother's Day is approaching.  I was not blessed with motherhood and my mother has been gone many years but I'm still pissed off.  She was 69. Pancreatic cancer.  (Insert "f" word here....)  Those of us with infertility and failed adoption issues have always found MD to be a trauma-inducing "holiday" that personally guts me like a fish.  When life gives you lemons, make lemonade - right?  I started thinking about all the MD presents I've never received, all the cards and flowers and - well, that adds up to some serious cash, right? So, feeling sorry for myself, I felt free to go ahead and spend a little of what my husband and/or kids would have spent.  Bingo - rationalized.

I had a lovely time at Portsmouth Fabric getting overwhelmed by bolts and bolts of amazingly beautiful fabric.  That alone made me feel better. Quilters will understand how that works.  I even had some laughs with the staff as a siren kept sounding in the distance and we couldn't figure out what it was until some guy stuck his head inside the door and said, "I think that is the siren from Seabrook!"  (Local nuclear power plant. I am not kidding.)  I stood there and thought about where I was and if there was indeed a core meltdown I'd be dead pretty fast.  Then I kept shopping.  What better place to be?  My husband and family all know I love them - we never separate without saying so - and I'm pretty much right with my Lord.... so I kept shopping and discussing (with the shop ladies) where the nearest bar with the best food was just in case it really was the "end of time" or something. I figured I'd fare pretty well at my judgement if my Mom saw me with a vodka tonic in my hand - she'd claim me in a minute just to have a sip or two. Or three.

Then I drove back home and listened to another podcast from Pray As You Go.  You have got to love the Jebbies, they come up with some really good stuff.  Anyway, I did a lot of thinking, a lot of sorting out and a whole lot of mental housecleaning. When I got home I made a new sign for my sewing room and put a copy of it in my bathroom.



It's out there.  It's all around me.  I have a feeling it would save me a lot of the time I spend worrying - AKA threading beads on a string with no knot at the end. I'm going to find joy every day.  Wish me luck. I need some joy.

PS - here is a great start.  I never watch these things but for some reason I did this one. WOW.

Caine's Arcade

Labors of Love - Quilts from the Heart

The Why Quilts Matter post went live today - here is the link!    

February is the month for giving and receiving expressions of love.  Mothers, fathers, friends and dear ones all given love tokens in a variety of shapes, sizes, colors, mediums, and all-important flavors of chocolate.I have always considered quilts to be among the greatest expression of love but only recently have I fully appreciated the depth and scope of their significance. Quilts I made over the past 20 years have been displayed in homes, been unfolded, used, refolded, comforted babies, warmed bodies and family pets, all the time witnessing and absorbing the history of their lives, the growth of their children, the pack-up-and-moves to new cities.
Baby quilts are always a satisfying labor of love. I have a nephew who was so desperately attached to the shredded remnants of his baby quilt and a receiving blanket that he loved to bits (literally) and squeezed them into a ball of shreds. He tucked it up inside his pillowcase (so no one would know) and held on to it well in to his early teens. Mom was insistent the baby quilts she made for her  grandchildren be used and washed, and was keenly pleased to see how long her grandson held on to the quilt she made just for him.
My favorite baby quilt was one made by my mother when Joe and I were newly married and confidently planning a family.  Fate intervened and no babies ever came. The quilt was always in our bedroom, draped over a quilt holder for about 20 years.  When my god-daughter had her first child I decided it was time to let go of that quilt and find it a home with Mom's new great-grandson.  The emotions surrounding the giving and receiving of that quilt cannot be expressed in words.  For me it defined a four-generation gift of love in so many ways, with both a melancholy ache and tears of joy.

Quilts are visual and tactile manifestations of love.  Who hasn't been sick and wrapped up in a quilt and felt just a little bit better, or at least comforted? When missing my Mom overwhelms me I grab a quilt she made and roll myself up, inhale the fabric and trace my finger over her carefully hand quilted stitches, taking to her and feeling a bit of her presence in my needy soul. So many pioneer brides crossed the frontier with a signature quilt packed among her belongings, a physical reminder of home and loved ones she might never see again.  How cherished those quilts must have been even as they were pressed into service warming bodies or blocking sod house drafts and windows with non existent-glass.

[caption id="attachment_2354" align="aligncenter" width="467" caption="A heart Mom made for me, on my design wall."][/caption]

In the late 70’s, when my Grandma Major (Dad’s mother) was in the nursing home, my mother made her a lap quilt out of scraps of our old dresses and pantsuits. We still have the precious keepsake and it was covering Dad the night he left us. While Mom was waiting for him on the other side, a quilt she originally made for his mother was keeping him warm.

The Family Quilt

At both of their funerals the double wedding ring anniversary quilt made by their three daughters covered their caskets with beauty and love.

I invite you to look back over the years and inventory the quilts you have seen, given, been given or were just privileged to see in a show or exhibit. Every one of those quilts matter - every one that you or I or anyone has ever made, regardless of shape, size, color or intricacy.  No such labor of love should be judged anything but the most wonderful gift from the heart. It blesses both the giver and the recipient with the greatest gift of all -- a colorful, tactile and enduring expression of love.  When the flowers have faded and the chocolate a memory, the quilt endures as a lasting and constant assurance of true love. Happy Valentines Day – to you and to all you love.

NOTE:
I was asked to write a guest blog for Why Quilts Matter and the above entry  was the result.  Why Quilts Matter is a scholarly, entertaining and visually stunning DVD. A copy should be in the home of anyone who loves art, color, and beautiful quilts. I do not in any way benefit monetarily from this - I just believe in it, and as one who loves art, color and beautiful quilts I bought two copies and donated one to my local library. Do the same. RESPECT and support for quilting begins with each of us.

UFO to CG

Like any respectable quilter I have a collection of UFO's (unfinished objects) that have cried out for my attention but never quite captured it - but then, if I knew how to finish them they would not be UFO's, right?
On Christmas night we get our little group together for dinner at our friend Tom & Joe's house. (Nothing like an impending Christmas party to light a fire under the UFO cauldron.)  I needed gifts for three ladies who (lucky for me) appreciate hand-made items.   I learned a few things that I thought I would share with you:

1.  Anything - and I mean anything - can be made into a tote bag.

2.  I need to invest in a good walking foot for my Bernina.

Solange, a bona fide French Parisian, was born and raised just outside Paris in a village where her father was mayor. When WW II broke out this graduate of La Sorbonne went to work for the US Intelligence Service and can tell stories that would curl your hair - all in the name of freedom.  I adore this woman. I want to be Solange when I grow up.  She is always incredibly and immaculately dressed, most often in haute couture Chanel she wore (and still fits into) from back in her college years in Paris. (It still looks fabulous.)  For Solange I made a tote bag out of some Michael Miller fabric that was a gift from a friend who went to Paris.  I was going to make a bag for myself but got sidetracked and never got it done.  The fabrics, the colors and the subject matter were a perfect match for Solange, who loved the bag.  This is how it came out:

[caption id="attachment_2281" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Interior bag"][/caption]

Irma was next.  Irma is a pistol, she's an 80-something firecracker who loves being (as she calls herself) our "Jewish Friend" in attendance at our annual Christmas party.  This year Irma brought her mother's Hanukkah menorah and we had a little ceremony where she lit candles and did the blessing. It was sweet.  Irma is also a world-class knitter so I knew she didn't need a tote bag as much as a knitting bag.  I had a few pieces of Sashiko that I finished ages ago and had hanging in my sewing room gathering dust.  I combined them with some bits of a failed Japanese quilt that went south with a bullet (thankfully before I got too far) and made Irma a new knitting bag:

[caption id="attachment_2287" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Ignore the brassy yellow, it's all a deep gold"][/caption]

Last but not least was Kay, Tom's mother.  She is the only "mother" left in our little group, all of the rest of us having lost ours, so she is our group surrogate.  She is a warm and wonderful woman who taught English Literature (what's not to love!) and adores travel.  I had a wall hanging I was making for the kitchen that stalled out and sat in a box for 8 months when I took it out and decided it, too, could become a tote bag.  (See #1 above.)  I am delighted with how it turned out and I think Kay was equally delighted to receive it.  I have, however,  resolved that as much as I adore Japanese fabrics I have a looong way to go before I learn enough about sewing with them to try anything else very soon. (See #2 above.)  Here is Kay's bag:

[caption id="attachment_2290" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Haven't added the black handles yet...."][/caption]

So there you have it - a bunch of UFO's turned in to Christmas gifts.  No patterns, just did it on the fly. I always hesitate to give things I have made myself because I don't think they are quite "gift giving"  caliber but I love all three of these women and I wanted to give them something from my heart, something useful, practical, but with a little whimsy. They were very well received and I feel pretty good about that.  It's nice when giving a gift makes both the giver and the recipient happy, no?

PS - Sorry for the weirdly stacked images, Wordpress is trying to shove them all into the same gallery and I wanted to separate them into their own categories.  Anyone know how to change that?

[caption id="attachment_2291" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Detail - love those YoYo embellishments!"][/caption]

Christmas in the Garment District

We were given the most wonderful Christmas gift from a dear friend - 3 days in Manhattan (last week) to do the Christmas "thing" in the Big Apple.  I have not been to New York in ages and I must say things were different, but mostly in a good way.  It was much cleaner, much more polite (I know!) and had a much heavier police presence.  We had unseasonably warm weather, the kind that continues today and reaaaally harshes my Christmas buzz.  I like snow and at this time of year I want a little frosty.  We won't be able to use the fireplace on Christmas because it will be too warm. How messed up is that?

As for the trip we did the usual touristy things (and a few OMG things) and had a ball.  Joe had never been to the Empire State Building so we timed a late-afternoon visit to avoid the lines. SCORE.  We went right up and had a good look at the most amazing city on earth.  The lobby of the ESB was just restored to it's breathtaking art deco magnificence; it  was like being in a movie.  Rockefeller Center was decked to the 9's and full of skaters, shoppers and tourists. All good things led to lunches and we went full throttle on a few places, including the Stage Deli.  There is nothing like a great NY deli. Bonus - you aren't hungry for a full week afterward. Oy.

[gallery link="file" columns="2"]

The highlight of my trip was breaking my Garment District cherry.  I've wanted to go forever and decided this was the trip. (Note to self - leave the guys at a deli & Lionel Train store while I do my thing.)  I was only able to get to 2 places, B&J Fabrics and Mood Fabrics, but both were fantastic.  I found the most beautiful selection of Liberty of London tana lawns and I treated myself to two of them to be used in a future project that must be found UTTERLY worthy.  The big score came when my good buddy (whose name I can't remember) dove through piles of rolled bolts and helped me secure just the thing for my long-unfulfilled fantasy.  I've always wanted a dressing gown - a circa 1920's fabu thing that you see in movies. (Ashley Judd wore one in DeLovely and it was stunning.)   I have looked for one for years in every brick and mortar and online store I could find.  Even the fabric was impossible to obtain. The closest I came was a place that had a good embroidered faux silk Shantung done in a very passable... polyester. (I'm a champagne girl on a beer budget.)  I'd pretty much given up hope when I found a silk Shantung that was swweeeeet. It is light as air and has the most beautiful (tho impossible to accurately photograph) Nile green color, and since I needed a lot I  managed to negotiate a price I could live with. (I knew being married to a Sicilian would pay off someday. ) Likewise for the satin, which will be used to trim sleeves, pockets and a wide, lovely collar.  Oh sigh.  It really is Christmas! It will probably be next Christmas before I'm swishing around the house wearing it, but by then Joe will have found a proper chaise lounge for Madame to recline upon while she plays upon her iPad.  It could happen.

Unexpected Treasures

The great 1st-time-ever SWAP fun continues.   I'd almost forgotten that I would be the recipient of a swap gift when it arrived yesterday and  I was thrilled. I'd seen sneak previews on the Flickr page and coveted the hell out of the beautiful journal  (done in a fav fabric line) but did not think I'd be the lucky recipient. Squeee! Tammy (from Texas) is another incredibly talented person with a blog and an ESTY shop.  How do these women do it????  I can't even find  my good camera, but the shots below are a peek at Tammy's lovely handiwork.

[gallery link="file"]

BONUS - I also received an exquisite, hand-made ornament from my very talented craftsman-friend at Quiltboxes. (It's the center picture above.) I'm already the proud owner of one of his fantastic QuiltBoxes. It has a place of honor on my dresser (I wrote about it here) and this lovely ornament will probably hang from my pediment mirror because I'm sure as heck not hiding it in a box until next Christmas.

All of the above to say that the most wonderful gifts are those made by human hands.  I'm amazed and awed by the creative talent in the world.   We've lost so much of our humanity by paying for things with money we can't see, downloading books or records we can't actually touch or hold - it makes me feel we are slipping down a hole into a dark, solitary place. There is no finer present than one we can hold and feel and use and sense the good intentions and kindness  (and talent) of the person who made the gift. It adds an entirely new - and spiritually valuable - dimension to the gift.

Swap Performance Anxiety- Part 2: THE REVEAL

My first online swap - a fun thing people do, and quilters (apparently) do a LOT.  I've never had the nerve until this December when a Twitter peep suggested an online swap. (Please review Swap Performance Anxiety - Part I).

So who did I get?  Some nice quilter in the hinterlands who, like me, had never ventured into the swap arena?  Someone who would, like me, be under the radar?

NOPE.

I got a Zombie.  The Happy Zombie, Monica Solorio-Snow, designer of the fabric line Happy Mochi Yum Yum, "heroin" to many quilters.  I was dealt a published fabric designer, pattern designer - you get the drift.  Sweet merciful crap - you can understand what happened in my colon when I read that name and thought, "What the )#(*&)@(#  am I gonna do for her?"

I ended up chickening out and selecting a few Japanese fat quarters, adding some ribbon in her much-loved colors, and embroidering a little wool bird to satisfy my own need to include something "home-made" in the packet.  Then I tucked it into a cloth wine bottle gift bag I'd made ages ago and put it in the mail.  Then I had a drink.

A few days later, the Twitter feed heated up:

She was lovely.  She was warm and real and kind. I felt ridiculous for being so worked up about doing something for someone so accomplished.  One of the best things about people who do what they love is that they know and appreciate things that other people do for them because they know how much time and thought goes into creating things.  I have on more than one occasion  made dinner for a former chef of  Maison Robert in Boston.  When I confessed my anxiety she said, "You'll never know how much I love it when other people cook for me - it's just a joy to sit back, relax and enjoy the meal."

So there.  Let's all just relax.  Let's just, in the immortal words of Paul McCartney, "Let it be." It's so easy at this time of year to get all up in our heads about what we must do, produce, create and provide.  Let it go.  Let it be.  Rejoice in each other - the days we all have together are not as numerous as we'd like to think, the holidays are numbered and do not to be Martha Stewart TV perfect. (Seriously. Besides, she is loaded and she has paid staff. Who wouldn't be fabulous?)

Rule number one: don't sweat the small stuff. 

Rule number two:  it's all small stuff. 

~Robert Eliot

Swap Performance Anxiety - Part I

We've already covered my anxiety issues with creativity in art, but I've taken it to a new level.  In the world of social media, the online quilter community is alive, well and active!  I ventured in to an online swap organized by an online peep  who threw out the idea of having a secret Santa swap via Twitter. I jumped right on that idea as a great way to venture in to my first-ever swap.   (Disclosure - in the evenings, I sit with my iPad and enjoy an adult beverage while I read through the tweets of like-minded quilters, comics, and others.) These "adult beverages" get me to do things I might not normally do if my performance anxiety fears are not properly repressed.

ANYWAY, I signed up for my first swap.  It took a little time for Amy to sort out the participants (I think there are over 50 of us) and get us all partnered off. There is a $15 limit, it can be hand made or not, and finished and in the mail  by December 10th.  Easy peasy, right?  Right.

Sure. Unless the Secret Santa Swap partner is a quilting uberstar.  Holy crap.  When I saw the name I nearly fell over.  My first reaction was to bail out.  Honest.  What do you do for someone like that?  I spent the first week just spiraling.  I spent the next week attempting to do some sashiko in her favorite colors.  It came out nice, but not "here is something I made just for you" nice, but "what the hell are you on" nice.  I caved in and set it aside. It's not that bad, just not good enough to offer someone with her background.  Crap.  It's just a swap, right?  It's not eternal judgement, right?

In the end, I decided to.....WAIT.  I mailed the package today and I can't really say what it is in it until it is received by my partner.  I'll reveal who it is (and what I sent) in a later post.  In looking at the pictures of what other swappers sent (on a Flickr page) I'm feeling pretty okay about what I ended up doing.  Not great..... but okay.  That's enough for me, the twin sister of Stuart Smalley:

The Mystery of the Bernina Walking Foot

HELP!  I've got this thingie that has another thingie and I can't for the life of me figure out how this should fit on my Bernina 1090 and operate as a walking foot.  Even the good people at @berninausa can't seem to fathom how this thing works.  They said it fits the same way the new one does, but mine doesn't have a....um....."receptacle" for the machine to poke into. (Think male/female parts.)  Here are a couple of pictures I shot with my iPod touch (my digi camera is MIA....)

[gallery link="file" columns="2"]

Anyone have a clue?  ANYONE?  It has a little arm that should go up and down if it were somehow connected to something, but it doesn't have the little "claw" at the end of it to hook on to your needle bar.  It also has a long, l-shaped arm thingie that somehow hooks in to it and lets you use that to measure the distance between your quilting lines so you don't have to mark up your fabric.  I really want to use a walking foot in my quilting SOMEDAY, but I have no idea how this thing works.  I know my mom used it, but alas - that is one part of the enormous cargo of information that sailed when she did.  I've tried using my MOMStar but that doesn't work either. Maybe I'll make a vodka and Squirt and see if I can channel her.  (That reference was for my sisters. xxxx)

ANYONE?

Magenta Vendetta

Color has always intimidated me.  In my earliest youth I believed the power to unleash my vast artistic talents depended solely on getting the BIG BOX of Crayola Crayons when school started in the fall.  Every year I wanted the big box - and every year I was let down. I can't blame my mom, she had 6 kids to buy schools supplies for and not much in the expendable resources department. Sure, I was blessed to start school wearing those beautiful dresses and outfits she slaved over,  but all I really wanted that damn big box of crayons that had the crayon sharpener in the back. FOR REALS - a crayon sharpener!  Oh, I knew I would be absolutely prolific if I had that weapon in my arsenal.

Magenta was the queen of the crayons.  I loved that crayon color more than my own life. I always asked to borrow it from friends who had parents that loved them and did not abuse them by sending them off to school in front of God and everybody with a measly 12 or 24 pack of crayons.  M a g e n t a. Say it loud and it's almost like murmuring an enchantment. My brother Gary got the semi-big box one year and it had a magenta crayon...but he knew I loved it and never let me touch it.  My opinion that brothers are turds was formed early.

To this day color still intimidates me.  Up until a few years ago I wore only browns, blues, soft tones that just stayed in the back row and didn't clamor for attention.  Quilting has helped change that in a big way.  Now I look for clothing with a little POP of color and have a little somethin' funky behind them.  It's hard to find them in clothing that is "suitable" for my age. I've long since lost the desire to show the world my "girls" - in fact, I'd donate them, I'm so tired of hauling them around.  Ditto for pants that ride low on the hips or have great color but are ruined with a splatter of fake bleach or worse - rhinestones.  Believe me, no one wants to see my ass bedazzled.

Fast forward to a blog surfing session about 3 weeks ago.  I saw this done by a woman who did it for her nieces and I just loved it!   I wish I could remember where I saw it so I could give her proper credit. My bad.   Anyway, I thought I'd do it up and hang it in my sewing room as a reminder that color is now my friend.  I went to the craft store to pick  out  a stretched canvas and headed over to look at the crayons.  The whole GET THE BIG BOX thing came back to me so overwhelmingly I just grabbed it and threw it in the cart.  HAH. I laughed all the way home, and squee'd  as I fired up my hot glue gun and glued them on in a neat little row.  Then I tipped the canvas on an angle, turned on my very hot blow dryer  and this is the result:

Tah-dah!   Isn't it a howl?  You can guess which little crayon was spared the vindictive wrath of the hairdryer.  Yes - I now have a magenta crayon. It will remain mine forever and be perfect forever.  I'm ready to move on and grow up.  I have vanquished my white 4-H ribbon and resolved my magenta vendetta. I'm even feeling more kindly toward my brothers, although they still give me attitude for not having a "real" job.  Whatever.

Like Arthur's sword Excalibur, Luke's light sabre, and Harry's wand I too have my talisman of power and will wave it at the world and accomplish great things.  I promise to use it for good and not evil. Thank you, Crayola Crayons -  thank you for my magenta.